Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Thank You

An open letter to my friends & family in California -

To those of you came up to Laura and me this weekend and gave us support for wearing our Vote No on Prop 8 shirts at the soccer games - THANK YOU. Your support means the world to us.

To those who bought and are wearing your Vote No on Prop 8 shirts and hats, or put signs in your yards - THANK YOU - we are in this fight together.

To those of you who volunteered time, or money, or blog space, or an opinion to a friend, to try to articulate why voting in a constitutional ban on my rights won't make your marriage any safer or more stable - THANK YOU.

To those of you who have stolen my No on 8 signs from my yard - you'll have to try harder than that; I have a lot more signs.

To the SHITHEAD who tailed Laura in his car, circled the block, parked, and waited for her to come out of a sandwich shop today, so he could spit on her for wearing her Vote No on Prop 8 shirt - SCREW YOU. Does your marriage feel safer now? Do you think your kids are safer now, because you spit on a soccer mom getting her lunch? Do you think my kids are better off now because of your action?  What marriage are you trying to protect?

To those of you who may be uncertain on this issue, or think that voting Yes will somehow protect your (or my) children from something you don't agree with - I hope you'll consider your relationship with Laura and me and your opinion of us as committed parents when you go into the voting booth on November 4th.  I hope you'll consider the fact that in the 18 years we've been together, we have not destroyed one single heterosexual marriage.  At least not knowingly. 

That's a joke. But seriously, if we had been married for the last 18 years, legally married, would it have impacted you? Would it have jeopardized your marriage? Been a threat to your children? Would you have even have noticed? If you vote Yes, you're standing with the asshole who SPIT on Laura today - you're validating his bigotry by voting in a constitutional amendment with the sole purpose of eliminating my existing, legal rights. 

And if you do support us, or if I helped you to change your mind, please let us know.  Otherwise know that your silence speaks volumes too. 

If you won't consider us, at least consider the facts:

Fiction: Prop 8 doesn’t discriminate against gays.
Fact: Prop 8 is simple: it eliminates the rights for same-sex couples to marry. Prop 8 would deny equal protections and write discrimination against one group of people—lesbian and gay people—into our state constitution.

Fiction: Teaching children about same-sex marriage will happen here unless we pass Prop 8.
Fact: Not one word in Prop 8 mentions education, and no child can be forced, against the will of their parents, to be taught anything about health and family issues at school. California law prohibits it, and the Yes on 8 campaign knows they are lying. Sacramento Superior Court Judge Timothy Frawley has already ruled that this claim by Prop 8 proponents is “false and misleading.” The Orange County Register, traditionally one of the most conservative newspapers in the state, says this claim is false. So do lawyers for the California Department of Education.

Fiction: Churches could lose their tax-exemption status.
Fact: Nothing in Prop 8 would force churches to do anything. In fact, the court decision regarding marriage specifically says “no religion will be required to change its religious policies or practices with regard to same-sex couples, and no religious officiant will be required to solemnize a marriage in contravention of his or her religious beliefs.”

Fiction: A Massachusetts case about a parent’s objection to the school curriculum will happen here.
Fact: Unlike Massachusetts, California gives parents an absolute right to remove their kids and opt-out of teaching on health and family instruction they don’t agree with. The opponents know that California law already covers this and Prop 8 won’t affect it, so they bring up an irrelevant case in Massachusetts.

Fiction: Four Activist Judges in San Francisco…
Fact: Prop 8 is not about courts and judges, it’s about eliminating a fundamental right. Judges didn’t grant the right, the constitution guarantees the right. Proponents of Prop 8 use an outdated and stale argument that judges aren’t supposed to protect rights and freedoms. This campaign is about whether Californians, right now, in 2008 are willing to amend the constitution for the sole purpose of eliminating a fundamental right for one group of citizens.

Fiction: People can be sued over personal beliefs.
Fact: California’s laws already prohibit discrimination against anyone based on race, religion, gender, or sexual orientation. This has nothing to do with marriage.

Fiction: Pepperdine University supports the Yes on 8 campaign.
Fact: The university has publicly disassociated itself from Professor Richard Peterson of Pepperdine University, who is featured in the ad, and has asked to not be identified in the Yes on 8 advertisements.

Fiction: Unless Prop 8 passes, CA parents won’t have the right to object to what their children are taught in school.
Fact: California law clearly gives parents and guardians broad authority to remove their children from any health instruction if it conflicts with their religious beliefs or moral convictions.

Regardless of how you feel about the issue, Californians should not eliminate fundamental rights for ANY Californians. Please vote NO on Prop 8.

Thank you. You may now continue on to the soccer photos...


rockmomnoff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rockmomnoff said...

Seriously those of you who have not said anything of support to me at the soccer games, practice or even at school. I do hear that silence and it YELLS you are not with me on this issue and it hurts me more than you could ever know! When you have been to my home and I to yours and you have seen me with Stacey and my children and you KNOW ME! Just know that if you do this you are disrespecting my family. And lastly to Debbie who gave me a shoulder to cry on yesterday. Thank you so much!!


Dennis said...

Stacy, it's Dennis (former prisoner of the Gap). Paula N. sent me a link to your blog.
I am so sad about your post! I cannot believe the illogical hatred and physical attacks you guys (we gays) STILL have to endure … even here in the SF Bay Area! Isn’t this 2008? OMFG! Of course, I’m throwing around my weight around (with what little sway I have) to join you in opposing Prop 8! I’m phone banking tonight in the Castro with friends. I just wanted to say hello, and thank you and encourage you keep up the good fight!! Be well, Dennis.

PS – I left the Gap a couple of months ago and I am working in the Financial District. I escaped!

Stacey said...

Dennis! How are you?? I hope you come back and read my post about my kitty litter cake...YOUR kitty litter cake! Everyone loved it! Send me your email address!


Mayberry Magpie said...

I live in a state that approved its own Prop 8 years ago. I raged, I rallied, I wrote letters, all to no avail. At the time, my husband and I were transitioning from a two-working parent family to a one-working parent family -- with him staying home. Many folks don't get that minor twist on domestic arrangements. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you.

Cheri @ Blog This Mom! said...

I am so sorry to hear that someone actually followed Laura (I love that name, by the way) to spit on her. I have gotten dirty looks and unkind words for wearing my NO on 8 button, but not spit. Ugh. I am so sorry. This whole thing just breaks my heart. Our society has so far to go, but we will get there because people like you speak out. Thanks.