Friday, October 31, 2008

Halloween Project # 3 (Potluck Fun!)

Welcome Bossy People!!! Please stay a while, enjoy the cake, and help us beat Prop 8! I'm sooooo excited to be Bossy's Featured Gay!

Exciting news! This blog has a guest writer today: Pioneer Woman. OK, not really. That would be cool though. Instead, I'm channeling her for the remainder of this post. Here goes.

So I organized a Halloween potluck at work, based on past successes at previous employers. And I threw down the challenge to everyone at work, that NO ONE will top my entry in the Halloween-themed food contest.

So, do you need a good Halloween dish to bring to a potluck? Then read on! And for those who came to our party and are disappointed that you didn't see this dish there, you have the girls to blame; they thought it would be too gross. And for those who came to our party and are relieved that you didn't see this dish there, you have the girls to thank.

So, we're making a cake. Here's the cast of characters.

Prepare cake mixes according to instructions on the box Any kind of cake will do. I used chocolate, because that's what I like. You use what you like. Lemon or vanilla would have been equally good. You'll need 2 pans, 9 x 13 will work best I think.

Put cake in the oven. Let children lick bowl. And fingers. And arms. Do not let children lick each other.

While cake is baking, put 3 "golden" oreos in a ziplock bag, and smush them up. Yes I said smush. We chose to use a glass, but anything heavy will do to crumble them to little bits.

Add a few drops of green food coloring, and mix around. You want them slightly green, not completely saturated.

In my opinion, this was a little too green, but it won't harm anything. Try to achieve a shade lighter than shown here. Set aside for later.

Now, you'll need to pulverize the entire rest of the bag of cookies.

I used a blender, chopping up a few at a time. I wouldn't recommend this method unless you have nothing else available. (I couldn't find my food processor; if I had, I'm sure that would have worked better.)

Whatever you use (rolling pin, meat tenderizer, etc...) just be sure to get rid of all the big pieces, and crumble it pretty small. Here's the finished product, the entire bag, pulverized into little bits.

Now. There are a few secret ingredients I haven't mentioned yet. I didn't want to scare you off. Stick with me here - it will be worth it, I guarantee it.

Secret ingredients #1 and #2: Cat Liter Pan and Cat Litter Scoop FRESHLY PURCHASED. From a reputable establishment. Whatever you do, don't use one you picked up for cheap at a garage sale last weekend.

Wash secret ingredients. I find it's best if you have proof that you washed them, as in these photos.

See? Really. Hot soapy water. Nice and clean. Try not to dislodge the sticker that says "Cat Litter Pan" on it, because that really adds to the effect.

You know where I'm going with this cake now, don't you? No more fooling you! Really, try to stick it out. You won't believe the end result. I must say I'm quite proud of this cake (and I owe it all to a friend - thank you Dennis for the original!)

OK, so after the cake has cooled, transfer it to the cat pan, like so.

Remember how I told you to make 2 cakes? That's because one isn't big enough to fill the cat pan. But I didn't have 2 rectangular pans, so the second cake I made in round pans. Makes no difference really. I sliced the round cake into strips.

Honestly I should have leveled both the cakes off first, by cutting off the rounded tops. But hey, this cake is not really standing on aesthetics if you know what I mean.

Fill in the rest of the cat pan with slices of cake. You can see I wasn't neat about it all, and you'll never notice later.

Frost the cake. Again, I chose chocolate, you could choose any type. Another way to make this is to blend the cake & frosting altogether and fill the pan that way. I suppose that would work, I've never tried it.

After frosting the cake, frost the children. Lick the children. (Not really.)

OK, now this is getting goooood. Take the crumbled oreos and sprinkle them on the cake! Completely cover the top.

Get all the corners, don't leave any frosting showing. See the glob of frosting on the side of the pan. Leave it there, it adds to the effect. Trust me.

There we go, this is coming together nicely now. (I'm starting to get a little worried about what my boss will think about this cake? Oh well, too late to think about that now!)

Now, another secret ingredient. See if I'd told you everything up front you would have guessed, right? And that wouldn't have been any fun, would it? Or you might have gotten disgusted and left. But now I have you - you're hooked aren't you? Horrified, repulsed, but you can't look away, can you? I dare you.

See, you couldn't do it.
Moving on.

Tootsie rolls. Medium sized, maybe the really big ones if you can find them. I couldn't.

Arrange a few on a cookie sheet.

Like so...and pop in the still warm oven. Not too long now, keep an eye on them.

While you're waiting for the tootsie rolls to soften up, sprinkle the green cookie crumbs over the cake. Why? Because cat litter has crystals, silly. Crystals of what, I'm not sure, odor absorbing material? Who knows, just sprinkle.

There, see? That's looking really authentic, isn't it? Disturbingly so, if I do say so myself.

Pull the tootsie rolls out of the oven. These got a bit more melted than I'd hoped; I was worried they wouldn't work since they lost their shape.

However, since they weren't too hot, I could easily roll them in my hand, which worked great. So, roll them out....

And place them in the cat box, just so. There we go. That looks GREAT. Yummy too, right?

Continue with more tootsie rolls until you feel you have enough.

Be SURE to have one or more drape over the edge for more authenticity. I also found pinching the ends smaller was good too. Then, stand back and admire your work! Voila. But wait, you're not quite done yet...

When preparing to serve your guests, place the pan on newspaper, with the litter scoop nearby. Use the litter scoop to serve the cake.

Then, admire your final masterpiece. It is a thing of great.....creativity? madness? art? Don't you think?

What do you think???? Scroll down a little further...see the "Post a Comment" link down there? Why not click it and leave me one? Tell me what you think of this delicious, delectable cake. Are you going to rush right out and make one? Or are you like Laura, and get a little bit of throw up in your mouth just looking at the picture?? Really, I want to know. I can take it. But don't email me. Leave me a comment, below, in the comments section... others want to see what you think too.

Most importantly, tell me if you think I'll win for "grossest dish" in today's potluck contest!!

Happy Halloween!!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

And another post on Prop 8

A short story about how much the "Yes on 8" folks care about families and their rights....

There was this charter school in San Francisco.  A first grade class had a beloved lesbian teacher who was getting married.  One of the student's parents came up with an idea to take the kids on a field trip to City Hall to throw rose petals on their teacher after her wedding.  The parents talked it over, and two families opted out of the field trip, as is their right, and as was supported by the other parents.

The rest of the parents (including one who is a school principal) loaded their kids on Muni and took them to City Hall to see their beloved teacher right after her wedding.   

The school director noted that the with the historic significance of same-sex marriage and related civil rights issues currently under discussion she saw this as a "teachable moment" and authorized the field trip, which was again, thought up and initiated by the parents

So then what happened you ask? Well, the married teacher and her wife toured the city with a "Just Married" sign on their car, along with a "No on 8" sign.  The happy couple went on their honeymoon.  The kids went back to school for the day, and life went on.  

Then a San Francisco reporter wrote a story in the SF Chronicle and posted video of the children throwing roses, online at  

And then what? Then the "Yes on 8" campaign stole the video of the kids throwing flowers that was posted on the Chronicle, doctored it up with menacing music, and used it in an ad supporting Prop 8 on their website and on statewide television, without permission from the kids' parents or the Chronicle.  

In a letter to the San Francisco Chronicle, the parents wrote, in part:
"Our children are being exploited and used as pawns to further a political cause...We ask that you intervene immediately on our behalf and issue a cease and desist letter to the Yes on 8 campaign.  If the campaign does not remove the ad, we ask that you pursue legal action against them."
"Prop 8 claims to be about families, but we're here to say you can't be for families by attacking our families.  You can't be for families and take these children's innocent images and flash them not only on television statewide, but on your fund raising page. This must stop right now." 

So, the the moral of the story is that Yes on 8 cares about kids and families, but not if those families' rights get in the way of the campaign's agenda of hate.   

Below is a video of the outraged parents whose kids' images were used without their permission. 

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Halloween Project # 2 (PARTY!)

Ok ladies & gents - Saturday night was a BLAST!  Laura and I and the girls had a fantastic time, and were so glad so many of you came, ate, drank, played eyeball relay races and pin the nose on the pumpkin, and ate, and drank, and played guitar, and drank...(are you sensing a theme here?).

I am definitely up for making this an annual tradition!  Especially since Laura, with a unique combination of insomnia and OCD, got up at the crack of dawn on Sunday and cleaned everything up, before I could even stumble out of bed!  Yeah Laura, go Laura, woo hoo for Laura!  :) Insomnia + OCD - it's a good thing!  

And cleaning up included rounding up: 4 shoes, 1 teeny tiny witch's hat, a way-cool skull chip & dip platter, 1 light "saver" (as Sophie & Zoe call them), a scary joker's / skull stick, one pair of nun's gloves, cat ears & tail, and an entire bubble bath costume (no Julie did not go home naked).  If you are still missing an item, please drop by or let us know & we can deliver it to school...

Special kudos to the Dads who took their kiddo's home early so Mommies could,, yeah that's it, talk.  Until midnight. Oh and maybe we drank a little wine with that talking...who was it that passed around all that wine anyway? Oh, right...that would be me.  How many times did I tell that story about pouring hotdog juice on my foot?? Oy.  

So here's what I learned about all of you that night.....wait, maybe I'd better keep those stories off the blog if I want to keep you as friends.  You can thank me later.  You can also thank me later (or kick me) for taking NO pictures all night long. What was up with that??!! Oh yeah, 20 kids, 20(?) adults, 2 games (believe it or not I had 3 more planned....), food, drinks, guitars, drinks, dvd players that wouldn't work, great conversation, drinks...I think I got a little distracted.  Therefore, there will be no photographic evidence of this event posted here...unless Debbie chooses to share her pictures with me.  (If you want to keep them off the web, bribe Debbie.)

Some of you also mentioned that you wanted a "No on 8" shirt like those you've seen us wearing.  You can contact my friend Michele, at or 925-828-0210 or and she can whip you up one in 2 days! (But act fast, the election is only a week away!) Michele's a local business woman right here in CV & would love your business.  Her husband Scott is my bass teacher & a way cool musician himself.

Thank you again for such a great time on Saturday!!  All the kids were great, the older ones especially for rounding the littler ones up into games (or maybe they just ordered them to stay in the playhouse & be quiet?  Who knows!  They weren't bugging their parents and THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS). I definitely had a good time & am glad all of you did too!  

Happy Halloween! 

Friday, October 24, 2008


Oh, this is just so wrong.  Yes on Prop 8 is blackmailing businesses....

I certainly hope that this lame blackmailing attempt would not influence any business leaders who had the foresight to donate money against this hateful bill.  

In other news....I received many, many supportive emails and comments from Wednesday's post.  I was very happy to receive the great support from fellow parents at the girls' school, and from many friends and family.  Everyone's appalled by what happened to Laura, as they should be.

I had the day off today & wore my shirt to school. The girls had to drop by the science lab on their way out, to redeem the tickets they received for being quiet for treats.  The science teacher said she liked my shirt, and made my day.  A mom of another student in the girls' class said, "I see all the Yes on 8 and No on 8 signs, I don't know what it's all about."  And I took the opportunity to explain it.  That Prop 8 eliminates an existing right for gay and lesbian people, and clarified that it has no wording whatsoever in it about schools or churches.

I don't know if I convinced her, I think I did. I think I helped clarify the issue. I hope I made a difference by wearing my shirt, and inviting conversation.  

We also decorated for the Halloween party and I went to soccer practice (still wearing my Vote No on Prop 8 shirt - man they're going to be sick of seeing me in that).  This was the practice where I became the official team photographer.  Apparently no one liked paying $60 per kid last year for the official photos, so the coach asked me to take the kids' pictures instead, since everyone liked ones I've done of the games.  Wow; it was hard. The girls were hot and antsy, and I wanted to make sure I got good pic's of all of them, so I took a LOT of pictures.  It took more than an hour.  Towards the end, the girls were just DONE, and when the coach asked me if I needed a glass of wine now I said, "hell yes!" a little too enthusiastically I think.  I haven't checked out the pic's yet...they'd better be good though, cause I can't do that again!  Children's photography definitely goes on the list of jobs I never want if my current career tanks.  

I'm off to get that glass of wine now, so I'll leave you with this little video. Enjoy. 

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Thank You

An open letter to my friends & family in California -

To those of you came up to Laura and me this weekend and gave us support for wearing our Vote No on Prop 8 shirts at the soccer games - THANK YOU. Your support means the world to us.

To those who bought and are wearing your Vote No on Prop 8 shirts and hats, or put signs in your yards - THANK YOU - we are in this fight together.

To those of you who volunteered time, or money, or blog space, or an opinion to a friend, to try to articulate why voting in a constitutional ban on my rights won't make your marriage any safer or more stable - THANK YOU.

To those of you who have stolen my No on 8 signs from my yard - you'll have to try harder than that; I have a lot more signs.

To the SHITHEAD who tailed Laura in his car, circled the block, parked, and waited for her to come out of a sandwich shop today, so he could spit on her for wearing her Vote No on Prop 8 shirt - SCREW YOU. Does your marriage feel safer now? Do you think your kids are safer now, because you spit on a soccer mom getting her lunch? Do you think my kids are better off now because of your action?  What marriage are you trying to protect?

To those of you who may be uncertain on this issue, or think that voting Yes will somehow protect your (or my) children from something you don't agree with - I hope you'll consider your relationship with Laura and me and your opinion of us as committed parents when you go into the voting booth on November 4th.  I hope you'll consider the fact that in the 18 years we've been together, we have not destroyed one single heterosexual marriage.  At least not knowingly. 

That's a joke. But seriously, if we had been married for the last 18 years, legally married, would it have impacted you? Would it have jeopardized your marriage? Been a threat to your children? Would you have even have noticed? If you vote Yes, you're standing with the asshole who SPIT on Laura today - you're validating his bigotry by voting in a constitutional amendment with the sole purpose of eliminating my existing, legal rights. 

And if you do support us, or if I helped you to change your mind, please let us know.  Otherwise know that your silence speaks volumes too. 

If you won't consider us, at least consider the facts:

Fiction: Prop 8 doesn’t discriminate against gays.
Fact: Prop 8 is simple: it eliminates the rights for same-sex couples to marry. Prop 8 would deny equal protections and write discrimination against one group of people—lesbian and gay people—into our state constitution.

Fiction: Teaching children about same-sex marriage will happen here unless we pass Prop 8.
Fact: Not one word in Prop 8 mentions education, and no child can be forced, against the will of their parents, to be taught anything about health and family issues at school. California law prohibits it, and the Yes on 8 campaign knows they are lying. Sacramento Superior Court Judge Timothy Frawley has already ruled that this claim by Prop 8 proponents is “false and misleading.” The Orange County Register, traditionally one of the most conservative newspapers in the state, says this claim is false. So do lawyers for the California Department of Education.

Fiction: Churches could lose their tax-exemption status.
Fact: Nothing in Prop 8 would force churches to do anything. In fact, the court decision regarding marriage specifically says “no religion will be required to change its religious policies or practices with regard to same-sex couples, and no religious officiant will be required to solemnize a marriage in contravention of his or her religious beliefs.”

Fiction: A Massachusetts case about a parent’s objection to the school curriculum will happen here.
Fact: Unlike Massachusetts, California gives parents an absolute right to remove their kids and opt-out of teaching on health and family instruction they don’t agree with. The opponents know that California law already covers this and Prop 8 won’t affect it, so they bring up an irrelevant case in Massachusetts.

Fiction: Four Activist Judges in San Francisco…
Fact: Prop 8 is not about courts and judges, it’s about eliminating a fundamental right. Judges didn’t grant the right, the constitution guarantees the right. Proponents of Prop 8 use an outdated and stale argument that judges aren’t supposed to protect rights and freedoms. This campaign is about whether Californians, right now, in 2008 are willing to amend the constitution for the sole purpose of eliminating a fundamental right for one group of citizens.

Fiction: People can be sued over personal beliefs.
Fact: California’s laws already prohibit discrimination against anyone based on race, religion, gender, or sexual orientation. This has nothing to do with marriage.

Fiction: Pepperdine University supports the Yes on 8 campaign.
Fact: The university has publicly disassociated itself from Professor Richard Peterson of Pepperdine University, who is featured in the ad, and has asked to not be identified in the Yes on 8 advertisements.

Fiction: Unless Prop 8 passes, CA parents won’t have the right to object to what their children are taught in school.
Fact: California law clearly gives parents and guardians broad authority to remove their children from any health instruction if it conflicts with their religious beliefs or moral convictions.

Regardless of how you feel about the issue, Californians should not eliminate fundamental rights for ANY Californians. Please vote NO on Prop 8.

Thank you. You may now continue on to the soccer photos...

Soccer Links

3 Soccer games worth of photos...enjoy!

October 12, 2008 - Jaguars vs. Soccer Chicks

October 18, 2008 - Jaguars vs. Firecrackers

October 19, 2008 - Jaguars vs. Teddy Bears

Friday, October 17, 2008

Miscellaneous Updates

We put Soph to bed in our bed last night, just skipping the step of having her wake up in her own bed, and there were NO night terror reoccurrences.  But who knows if the two correlate?  There's also no school today too, so it wasn't really a school night either.  To be fair, I also let Zo fall asleep with me…but transferred her to her own bed after she fell asleep cause that kid is 4 feet of knobby elbows and knees, and she likes to sleep with her head at the foot of the bed, and her feet on my pillow.  And I don't need to wake up with a foot in my nose on top of Sophie's yelling, or I'd be the one yelling "Don't squish me!"


Yesterday I received a statement from my 401(k) from my years at Gap.  My personal rate of return over the past 12 months? So glad you asked, it's -20%.  And over the past 3 years? 3.2% And that's only as of Sept. 30th; I'm sure it's even worse in the 2 subsequent weeks.  Glad I have it so heavily allocated to stocks for my "aggressive growth" plan for retirement…  I could have socked it in my savings account and earned more.  But aren't we all in the same boat? Sigh.



My neighbor called Thursday morning at 7:00 a.m.  "Look out your window" she said.  Fortunately my "Obama '08" and "No on Prop 8" yard signs were still in my yard, because her and her next door neighbor's are gone. AGAIN. I think ours remained only because Laura "taped the shit out of them" as she says, reinforcing them with clear strapping tape, making them impossible to destroy without a sharp knife or scissors, and because she wired them to trees inside our yard, behind our fence.  I doubt they'll make it to the election though, which is why I have extras in the garage.  And why I'm off to Home Depot at lunch today to get replacement bulbs for our motion light that shines directly on the part of the yard with the sign.



The No on 8 campaign is completely out of t-shirts and hats, etc….  So I worked with my bass teacher's wife, Michelle, owner of Bessie and Me, to make some. I plan to wear a shirt and/or hat that says No on 8 every time I walk around Castro Valley between now and the election.  There are Yes on 8 yard signs popping up all over town and it's disturbing me.  I'm most happy that Michelle will have the shirts ready tonight, so we can wear them at the girls' soccer games on both Saturday and Sunday this weekend. 


My neighbor is also planning to canvas the neighborhood on Sunday to speak to our neighbors about the measure; if soccer schedules allow, I will join her.  Although I'm nervous about finding out which of my neighbors supports us, and which don't.   



Finally - how come no one is talking about the fact that the Alaska legislature found Sarah Palin guilty of abusing her power as Governor??? 


Thursday, October 16, 2008

No insight from the school teacher

Parent teacher conference on Thursday went fine, both girls are doing great on their progress in 1st grade.  Sophie needs to work on her printing, making sure she doesn't turn her letters and numbers around backward, and on her spelling/sight words.  Zoe's right on track too, next up in her reading is more questions about comprehension.

We asked the teacher if anything weird or stressful was happening at school, or had happened recently, or if Sophie was displaying any unusual behavior.  She said no, she hadn't noticed anything unusual.  So, no insight into the night terrors from her.  

I was discussing it at work and a colleague told me she'd had them her whole life. Stress brings it on for her.  She said the first time it happened with her husband she sat bolt upright in bed and said, "Look out, he's here, he's got a knife!" and scared the shit out of her husband who had no idea what was happening and thought it was real!  

We'll see how it goes tonight....

Night Terrors, Night #3

So what Sophie experienced definitely is a night terror, not a nightmare, I figured that out from the web (thanks Dad).  And she's had them for 3 nights running now.  

Last night I got home late after my bass lesson, and ordering my "No on 8" shirts & hats from my bass teacher's wife, so I missed most of the debate.  When I got home I said good night to the girls who were in bed, chatted with Laura, got dinner, talked on the phone, etc... then sat down to watch the debate downstairs.  Laura went to bed.  I fell asleep toward the end & woke up when it was over, turned off the TV and headed upstairs to go to bed. As I went up the stairs I could hear Sophie talking, and as I get to the kitchen I see her in the living room, talking to herself.   No one else is there.  She's got her arms outstretched & saying "Because!" in a moaning voice, clearly upset.  But no one is in the room with her.  Talk about CREEP.Y.

Man these night terrors are weird. Since I've read up on them I'm a little better equipped to handle them than the first night, but that doesn't diminish how weird it is to see your kid go through this!  I picked her up and took her to my bed.  

I said "It's OK" and she said back "It's OK, It's OK, It's OK".  

I said, "Don't be scared, Mama's here." and she said "Scared...I'm so scared."  

I said, "I'll protect you" and she said, "Protect me Mama! Protect me!" again moaning and scared.  

But I started to realize that she was just repeating exactly what I was saying, and since I was voicing scared feelings, so was she. 

So then I said, "You're OK, you're happy, you're sleepy, you're relaxed. Relaxed and sleepy" and bingo, almost instantly her body relaxed, she rolled onto her side and snuggled against me and settled down, and she didn't say another word.  I kept repeating "relaxed and sleepy" until I was certain she was asleep, which didn't take long.  She was so open to suggestion.  I feel like I won a prize for calming her down so easily though.  

Still, it's all very disconcerting.  We have a parent-teacher conference today, so will definitely be asking about what's going on in school!    

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Remember Wax Lips?

Who knew you could still get them at Cost Plus? 

These were Laura's favorite things as a kid.  Obviously she still enjoys them.  Now they make them with FANGS!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


Last night about 9:30, an hour and a half after the girls went to bed, Sophie stumbled into the living room, mumbling.  We asked her what was wrong, and she wouldn't really answer, she looked odd too.  I asked her if she wanted a drink of water & as Laura picked her up she said "Yes, but I don't want to....." and burst out crying!  

We tried to put her in her bed, but something was obviously wrong, so I told her I'd lie down with her in my bed & took her there.  Laura set her down and she shouted, "BUT DON'T SQUISH ME!" and sat bolt upright in bed, stretched her arms out in front of her and screamed "MAAAAAMAAAA!" WHILE I WAS HOLDING HER AND HAD MY ARMS WRAPPED AROUND HER.   I asked if she could see me, she said yes, but wasn't looking at me.  She was terrified, and sobbing!  

Laura turned the hallway light on and that seemed to snap her out of it.  Her face changed, like a light went on inside her head.  She took a drink of water and settled down in my bed.  I tried to talk to her, find out if she had a bad dream, a bad day, had anything to talk about.  She said no.  We took her temperature, it was normal. 

About 45 minutes later she was sleeping again.  I got up to use the bathroom, and she got up AGAIN.  Didn't do anything weird this time, just came into the bathroom.  I took her back to my bed.  She laid awake but quiet for probably another hour.  

Definitely WEIRD. Neither kid has ever sleep-walked before, which is what we assume that was.  They never even have bad dreams.  It totally freaked us out.  Weird night. 

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Happy Birthday Dad!

Hi Dad!  Happy Birthday!  I hope it's a great one, and that this little trip down memory lane gives you a smile today!


PS - too bad about the hair.  :) Love you!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Spirit of Halloweens past...

We spent all weekend on Halloween projects, getting Zoe's costume ready, and confirming plans to host a kids & adults Halloween party, and then decorating the house. The party decorations are awesome...can't wait to share with you, pictures will be coming soon.

In the meantime, enjoy this slideshow from Halloweens past... (I'm having trouble posting the slideshow itself, so you'll have to click here to head over to Flickr to see it).

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Busy with work

I think I probably sent 800 emails at work this week, on top of attending 2 half day offsite meetings.  Consequently haven't been posting.  Will get back to it on Monday.  Have a good weekend all! 

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Photos from Lake Tahoe (finally)

Here are photos of our summer vacation to Lake Tahoe, which everyone thoroughly enjoyed!   Better late than never, huh?